Monday, May 19, 2008

I Should Write for The Onion

Harvard announced today that it would be buying the country of Liechtenstein, a small European country between Switzerland and Austria, and relocating operations. The move is expected to take place in a year or two, depending on when the infrastructure in the new location is prepped to accommodate the influx of new residents, and the sale of Harvard's current property holdings in Massachusetts.
"People are frequently saying our endowment is worth more than the gross domestic profit of many small countries," says president Drew Gilpin Faust. "Our research shows it was time to leverage that fact." Faust added that the discussion of taxing large university endowments in both the U.S. Congress and the state of Massachusetts contributed to the decision to relocate.

NB: The preceding is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to real people or institutions is either coincidental or used in a fictional manner by the author.

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